Find out your primary conflict habit and get UNSTUCK

Conflict Habits Assessment

By asking the question, “How do I respond to recurring conflict?” we gain insight into ourselves.

When we notice our own conflict habits, we then have the power to change them. And considering other people’s Conflict Habits helps us understand the patterns of interaction we've gotten stuck in with them.

Only once we notice our conflict habits and patterns can we take pattern-breaking action to free ourselves from the conflict loop and achieve optimal outcomes-- even without anyone else's cooperation.

Based on over 40 years of conflict and negotiation research, as well as Dr. Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler's original research on emotions and conflict and more than 20 years of practice with leaders in organizations, she has identified four Conflict Habits that keep us stuck in the conflict loop:

1 ) We Blame Others;

2) We Shut Down, avoiding conflict completely;

3) We blame and Shame Ourselves; and

4) We Relentlessly Collaborate, even when others refuse to cooperate.

This short, free quiz poses questions to identify your primary conflict habit.

The quiz takes about seven minutes to complete; answers are confidential.

Organizational leaders, executive coaches, professors, therapists, spouses, and parents already use this framework to help people free themselves from conflict and achieve optimal outcomes.

To learn more about the Conflict Habits, pick up the book, Optimal Outcomes.

Self-knowledge is power, and understanding your conflict habits will loosen their grip on you.

The four conflict habits are:

  • Blame Others
  • Shut Down
  • Shame Yourself
  • Relentlessly Collaborate

Which one might be your primary habit? Although you may use different habits depending on whether you are at work, at home, or in the community, it is still useful to ask yourself which habit you use most often.

Take this 16-question assessment to find out your primary and secondary conflict habit.

© 2019 Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler, Ph.D. All Rights Reserved.